This one is for the moms who are judging me quietly and outwardly, I’m doing what’s best for me. This one is for the moms who think I’ve changed, actually I’ve just become more comfortable allowing myself to be the real me. This one is for the ones who will unfollow me after seeing me in another rainbow romper, I’m not here to tailor my life to make you happy, listen, it’s hard enough to do that for me. I haven’t changed at all, it’s just your perception of me that has.

What you don’t see is all the messages from moms who thank me, for sharing every single part of being me and that is why I’m here. I’ve fought so hard to be the me you see today and there’s no going back.

What you don’t see is all the tears, the pain, the hard conversations, the years of trying to be someone I’m not. Society wants women to struggle, to care for everyone first and put themselves last, so I thought I was right on track, as a mother, a woman and wife. We all fight everyday to hang onto what little parts we have left of us, as all moms do. Maybe we struggle in different areas, but in the end we have way more in common than not and sticking together is way more powerful than not.

I’m here to help the moms feel less alone on the days they want to cry and give up. I’m here to show them that it’s ok to be yourself, no matter what that looks like. I’m here to encourage moms to forget about being the perfect mom, you are already everything they need you to be. I’m here to remind you that putting yourself first is not putting your children last and to take time love yourself too. I’m here to normalize what it means to be a mom and woman.

That anxiety and meltdowns can bring any great mom to her knees. That I too struggle with getting my kid to eat anything green. That my kids still take turns waking me up at night. That being a mom is hard but that doesn’t mean you need to be hard on yourself. I want to make you laugh and maybe sometimes cry, because the emotions we feel are valid, normal and sometimes just putting words to our feelings helps us process things a little easier.

I love each and every one of you. The messages, the comments, the time you spend with me is everything I ever needed as a new mom. I hope that I’m giving an ounce of that back to you too.

What you’re really saying when you reject me is that you don’t accept anything out of the “normal” heterosexual marriage, 2.5 kids and a dog. Which means you are setting standards on your own children that they might not be able to achieve and that they will also fall victim to pressures of living this cookie cutter life and the cycle will continue. Life is not one size fit all. The definition of happiness will look different for all of us.

Isn’t that the goal? Love and happiness?

You can be the juiciest ripest fruit and you’ll still meet someone who doesn’t like fruits. I’ve made peace with that.